The lights go out all around me; one last candle to keep out the night

Those who actually visit this blog will probably notice that I made a couple changes to it. What happens when you have some time on your hands and feel semi-bored (for those on facebook, you'll probably have no two clue what I'm talking about if you actually read this on there). Anyway, I felt that this template suited me a bit better than the last one though I may switch back to it or change things up at some point in time.
It has been wonderfully beautiful out lately (or at least until this afternoon) and I suddenly had the urge to write but have nothing to talk about (I'm rather uninspired right now). I suppose that's what happens when school ends and the stresses associated with school are suddenly taken away. Oh well.
In 3 days, a good friend of mine is getting married (putting the count on married friends up to 5) which is really exciting though there is always a slight melancholy associated with it for me since there is that slight bit of envy that pops up now and then. Envy and self-pity that they have found there true love and I am still waiting to run into mine. Oh well, I'll get over it quick enough and eventually, when I hit the age of 30, I will accept the fact that God has intended for me to live my life out as an old spinster who always catches the wedding bouquets but never is able to use them (I've actually never caught a wedding bouquet in my life but thought it sounded pretty good and sad). I then try pulling out of my melancholy by thinking that I'm extremely happy being single and don't have to worry about how much I have to spend on presents for the guy during the special days such as birthday, Christmas, Valentine's, and anniversary, I'm not going through emotional turmoil when the guy forgets those special occasions mentioned, and I'm saving money in not having to hire spys to make sure that the guy isn't cheating on me (ok, I would never do the last one but it was a fun thought). There are other thoughts but I can't think of them right now and the ones I've thought of have made me feel better already :D.
So, the above being said, you can probably guess that I'm not a huge fan of romantic commedies or romantic movies in general (except for one). It actually puts me in a worse melancholic mood than anything else. I actually come away from romantic movies feeling somewhat ticked and want to watch something involving death and killing right away (which, the news would probably a good place to turn for that but it tends to not have the right plot and storyline). Anyway, a taste of my evil, non-loving side.

Name that song

Slightly more light hearted than my last entry. I'm going to do the whole random 40 songs thing where I will list the first line of 40 songs that were played randomly on my windows media player library (unless they are Japanese, Chinese, French songs or instrumental). If you recognize the song, state the name of the song and the artist who sings it (without using google). Each song that is guessed correctly I will delete from the list. There are some songs that have more than one artist/group of artists that sing it and I will accept either one. Sarah and Rebekah can guess as long as they don't go searching in the windows media library. Have fun :).


1. I've been driving for an hour just talking to the rain
2.
3. Can I ask you a question please
4. We are the pirates who don't do anything
5. Have you ever seen such a beautiful night
6. When you're feeling lonely, lost and let down
7. I spent a day by the river
8. How I love your works, my God, my King
9. She's independent and beautiful, wish I could be like her
10. My own home, my own home, my own home, my own home
11. Tell everybody I'm on my way
12. What cha doing tonight, I wish I could be a fly on your wall
13. I am full of earth
14. When you find yourself in some far off place
15. There are things in life you'll learn and
16. Yeah I know it hurts, yeah I know your scared
17. If weakness is a word that no one wants to speak of
18. This time, this place, misused, mistakes
19. Rain, rain on my face
20. I couldn't catch my breath
21. I'm American made, but I like Chevrolet
22. Lets go back, back to the beginning
23. Come stop your crying, it will be all right
24. Always look on the bright side of life
25. Lights go out and I can't be saved
26. I've been thinking it over, taking the time to find words
27. Run away, run away, breath this in the waters way, waters way
28. I pray you'll be our eyes
29. Open up your eyes and see these warning signs
30. I'm an angel, I'm a devil, I am sometimes in between
31. Everybody look at me, me
32. The gold of Cortes, the Jewels of Pizarro
33. You think you're going nowhere when you're walking down the street
34. There's a song that's inside of my soul
35. Look at me, I will never pass for a perfect bride or a perfect daughter
36. Down here in the valley every shadow you see has its own story
37.
38. Sun kisses the window sill and I am still on my second cup of pitty me
39. Come to decide that the things that I tried
40. Pride is all we have now

Last day of the rest of my life. I wish I would have known cause I'd have kissed my momma good-bye.

It's interesting how things can change your perspective. About half an hour ago I was semi-rejoicing over the fact that I finished my last final exam and don't have to think about school for the next 4 months or so (I say semi cause I'm a bit worried about how I did :S ). I then go on the net and find out that 31 university students were killed this morning. It's a rather frightening and depressing thought that someone like me was at that university, possibly studying for one of their final exams or working on a report and suddenly is shot dead.
What drives people to go and kill people like that? It doesn't make sense to me at all. I guess on the reverse side, what makes it wrong to do that if there are no moral absolutes? Who determines what is right and what is wrong if all morals can be questioned? From an athiest/evolutionary perspective, we're all just animals anyway and our only purpose is to keep our species alive by producing offspring which, according to ecologists, we're doing too well and acctually hitting a point where we're over populating the earth. So is this evolutions way of controlling the population by breeding murderers along with those who are unable to reproduce whether by some genetic mutation or because they have decided that their orientation causes them to be unable to reproduce?
So back to moral absolutes, I've pretty much been told since my teen years that there are no moral absolutes. So, does that mean war isn't wrong since who has the authority to say that it is or isn't wrong especially since, according to evolutionary science, there is no God. What about terrorist attacks and stealing? Aside from making us scared and uncomfortable, what makes it morally wrong if nothing is absolute? When people do those things, isn't it morally correct to them? Do we as individuals and as a group have any right to say whether what someone did was wrong or not?
Another tangent, should we bother interfering with things that happen in other coutries that are war torn and having genocides? Should we help people who are starving to death because of a famine? Isn't it natures course and isn't it a possible way that evolution is using to control the amount of people on earth? According to black ecologists, 2/3 of the world population needs to die for the human population to be at the optimum size for the earth to support it.
Anyway, now that I've probably got several people angry at me, I'll just clarify that these were thoughts that have been going through my mind and don't necessarily reflect my personal beliefs, however, I'd be interested if anyone had any answers to the questions that I have posed without using any sort of religion to justify there answer (as I continue to sink deeper into the boiling pot).
For once, the song title does somewhat relate to the post unlike in the previous posts. Don't get to use to it though :D.